Sometimes I was waiting for a friend, sometimes I was rushing to make a train connection.
I have a handful of friends here in Tokyo that are dating, engaged to, or married to people here in Japan and all of us have different “how I met my boyfriend” or “how I met my girlfriend” stories.If you are going to be with someone outside of the country it takes a lot of heart, if you’re only looking for a “Japanese boyfriend” then you aren’t going to find someone you love.Instead, you might find a thing you wanted, break their heart, and discard it because it wasn’t the wonderful easy fantasy that you hoped it would be.Pretty much the entire reason my husband hates it when we go clubbing is because a lot of Japanese men go to nightclubs (especially “foreign nightclubs”) to meet Western women.I can’t count the number of American/European friends who have gotten a date and/or a good time from someone they met at a nightclub.It’s a great way to meet people in Japan (both dating and friends). If the website is in Japanese, you have a much higher chance of running into a Japanese man at the events.If you don’t speak Japanese, I highly recommend trying the Tokyo Meetup events (If you want to make some money on the side, not worry about putting yourself out there, and meet Japanese men, teaching private English lessons is the job for you.Many people do private English lessons in Japan (especially in college/if they’re young). Most are just meeting up with the “student” (businessman, housewife, teenager, etc) and talk for an hour and talk in English. A lot of my friends used the website Hello Sensei (you make a profile, list your price, etc, and students contact you directly).I also know a couple that met at random on the train, started talking, hit it off, and are still together, two years later. If you don’t mind dating and/or ‘going steady’ with a Japanese man who is married, you shouldn’t have any problems. I wouldn’t do it (personally), but I have a number of friends who have.To increase the chances of being “nanpa-ed,” make lots of eye contact and smile. Take a train together rather than a cab, so you know where you’re going (if you’re going back to his place). A Hobby Circle or Club A hobby circle is basically a club of people with similar interests.