Many were willing to engage in a candid, thoughtful discussion about their motivations. Dear Ynez, Allow me to answer your second question first, because it’s a lot quicker: No. So, in essence, you’re saying something as clichéd as “I like to laugh” or “I want a man who’s honest.” It’s a pointless point, and is one that’s bound to be ignored.2) The fact that he winks instead of taking the time to write to you speaks volumes about him.Don’t express in your profile that you prefer emails to winks. A wink says either that he’s lazy, he’s illiterate, or, more likely, that he’s winking at 50 people at a time to see who responds to him. ” Feel free to ignore anyone who doesn’t meet your criteria, Ynez – including your desire to be emailed – but please, don’t issue demands in your profile.He may actually be a decent guy – but he’s a decent guy who is pretty indiscriminate about the women he contacts. Next…I have two (and maybe even three) answers to your query about sending a follow-up email.Dating-site studies tend not to provide data about unsolicited versus solicited pictures, but anecdotally, it's safe to say that a lot of those pics were unwelcome.Just to be clear, I’m not the kind of girl who clutches my pearls in horror over the very idea of an R-rated pic.Many women love taking, sending, and receiving sexy pics — and that’s great.I’m talking about a very specific problem: the online equivalent of the subway flasher.
But then again, there are enough quality women that I don’t see why you’d write to the same uninterested ones twice. I’d maybe try an IM, if you really want to give it a second shot. If he is attracted to you but is dating other people, he’ll get back to you eventually, without any additional prodding on your part. Think about it: If a guy is doing great, he might get ten emails – and can manage to respond to the three or four attractive women in his inbox.If a woman is doing great, she might get 50 emails, or 150 emails, or 400 emails.This is someone who lobs a dick pic your way without ever having received any indication that this would be welcome. At its best, it's a bummer — since it means you wasted your time chatting with a jerk.To investigate the psychology of the dick pic, I spent weeks plumbing the depths of Craigslist and Reddit message boards like /r/sex and /r/okcupid, chatting with guys who have admitted to sending unsolicited dick pics out of the blue to women they’ve just met, either online or in person. Here are 16 things I, like many of you, wish I learned to say to a man right as I came of age instead of a decade too late. The art of expressing ourselves in living words, not typed ones, is proving increasingly challenging.She told me that she received over 500 emails in her first week. This reinforces why women are NOT obliged to write back polite rejection letters AND it reinforces why just because older men want attractive young women, they are unlikely to get a letter back. See my blog post “As Valuable as Your Options” if this isn’t clear to you. Plenty of women who are exasperated with the flood of emails delete their entire inbox just to keep things manageable.If she has 500 potential future spouses in the mix, why would she date a guy fifteen years older? What they DON’T do, and probably should is HIDE THEIR PROFILES.It’s not that it’s impossible that he was busy, or accidentally deleted your email, or had an emotional crisis that caused him to abandon dating for awhile.Rather, it’s that, 99 times out of 100, a guy who doesn’t write back to you is a guy who isn’t attracted to you. Because women – especially younger women – receive infinitely more emails than men.